Tuesday, October 27, 2009


After weeks of hunting for a place to move my uncle, I finally got my mom to settle on a place.

It was one of the first places we saw. It's in a 55 & over building, but they allow people over 21 to live with the 55+ person, so my cousin can live with my uncle.

My mom was hesitant to put him in there even though it is as close to perfect for my uncle as it can be.

It's about 2 miles from my mom, so a mile farther than she goes now, but that's as close as we could get him.

It's also got flexicore ceilings, so it is very quiet. Where he's at now is on one of the busiest streets in Chicago and is ridiculously loud. So, it will be nice to be somewhere quieter.

It has elevators and step-in showers and it's wide open so he can get around, plus there is a balcony he can get out onto without a ramp. It's cozy and nice without being too nice that we would worry about a potential mess.

And it's affordable.

My mom kept wanting to see what else was out there and I was the one doing the research to find places. Places he could get into are either too expensive or too far.

She said he was concerned about transportation for my cousin (he doesn't have a car) and the fact that it's a 55+ building.

I kept telling her not to worry about my cousin, when he starts paying rent, then he gets a say.

She was getting herself all worked up about it and super stressed.

Finally, last week after we went to see another place that would have been good except that the doorways are far too narrow and there is no step-in shower, I had had enough.

I told her that if he was so concerned about my cousin not having transportation and being far from young people, then why did he have no problem moving from house to house going further out into the boondocks in the far North suburbs for so long? There was no bus at all. No restaurants, no stores for miles. There is a bus stop right outside this place. Not CTA, but still, transportation.

I proceeded to tell her that his choices are this place or a nursing home. There is nothing else he can afford. And his son cannot go to the nursing home with him, so, those are his choices, stop kowtowing to everything he wants. We are running out of time and if you wait, you will lose this place and he will end up in a nursing home.

I was very angry. I get so tired of all of us having to bend for them, yet they keep demanding more and more and she lets them have what they want rather than drawing a line.

So, my rant apparently gave her courage because she basically told him what I just said and he said okay.


So, now we just have to figure out when to move him. We can move him in after the 15th of November and he has to be out of his current place by December 1st. The only issue is that Thanksgiving falls in the middle of that and my brother-in-law's 40th birthday, so our dates to move him are limited.

I so wish I had money to hire a moving company and let them deal with it all. He has so much stuff and there are so few of us. I hope we can keep him in this new place for a very long time. I hate moving him.


Shakespeare said...

What a nightmare you describe! Aack!

I'm glad everybody went along with it, finally, if only so you don't have to worry about it (not that the move isn't going to worry you from now until Dec. 1).

I wish you luck with the move--moves tend to be horrid experiences.

Lola said...

Lucky you were able to find a reasonable place to accommodate your Uncle. I hope the move goes smoothly.

BK said...

Glad that you have found a place for your uncle. And hope that the move will go smooth for you.

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